Leadership and Self Deception: Getting Out of the Box
by: Arbinger Institute, The Arbinger Institute
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Amazon.com Review:
Using the story/parable format so popular these days,Leadership and Self-Deception takes a novel psychologicalapproach to leadership. It's not what you do that matters, say theauthors (presumably plural--the book is credited to the esteemedArbinger Institute), but why you do it. Latching onto the latestleadership trend won't make people follow you if your motives areselfish--people can smell a rat, even one that says it's trying toempower them. The tricky thing is, we don't know that our motivationis flawed. We deceive ourselves in subtle ways into thinking thatwe're doing the right thing for the right reason. We really do knowwhat the right thing to do is, but this constant self-justificationbecomes such an ingrained habit that it's hard to break free ofit--it's as though we're trapped in a box, the authors say.
Learning how the process of self-deception works--and how to avoid itand stay in touch with our innate sense of what's right--is at theheart of the book. We follow Tom, an old-school, by-the-book kind ofguy who is a newly hired executive at Zagrum Corporation, as twosenior executives show him the many ways he's "in the box," how thatlimits him as a leader in ways he's not aware of, and of course how toget out. This is as much a book about personal transformation as it isabout leadership per se. The authors use examples from the characters'private as well as professional lives to show how self-deception skewsour view of ourselves and the world and ruins our interactions withpeople, despite what we sincerely believe are our best intentions.
While the writing won't make John Updike lose any sleep, the storyentertainingly does the job of pulling the reader in and making apotentially abstruse argument quite enjoyable. The authors have a muchbetter ear for dialogue than is typical of the genre (the book islargely dialogue), although a certain didactic tone creeps in now andthen. But ultimately it's a hopeful, even inspiring read that flowsalong nicely and conveys a message that more than a few managers needto hear. --Pat McGill
Product Description:
Leadership and Self-Deception is the first book to identify a single, underlying cause of every form of leadership failure. Through the story of Toma shluck in his managers wordsreaders discover that identifying and treating individual leadership problems as if they were separate and distinct is not enough to transform people into successful leaders. The authors suggest that the key to leadership lies not in what we do, but in how we "are." They explore this compelling secret: Self-deception is the central player and trap underlying all leadership failures, relationship issues, and performance problems in organizations. Leaders who live in the box of self-deception are trapped: they cannot lead, no matter how hard they try and no matter how many skills and techniques they employ. With convincing examples, the authors show clearly how self-deception operates and how to overcome it. While other books cover people skills, this one goes deeper, fully illuminating the secret to leadership success.
Using the story/parable format so popular these days,Leadership and Self-Deception takes a novel psychologicalapproach to leadership. It's not what you do that matters, say theauthors (presumably plural--the book is credited to the esteemedArbinger Institute), but why you do it. Latching onto the latestleadership trend won't make people follow you if your motives areselfish--people can smell a rat, even one that says it's trying toempower them. The tricky thing is, we don't know that our motivationis flawed. We deceive ourselves in subtle ways into thinking thatwe're doing the right thing for the right reason. We really do knowwhat the right thing to do is, but this constant self-justificationbecomes such an ingrained habit that it's hard to break free ofit--it's as though we're trapped in a box, the authors say.
Learning how the process of self-deception works--and how to avoid itand stay in touch with our innate sense of what's right--is at theheart of the book. We follow Tom, an old-school, by-the-book kind ofguy who is a newly hired executive at Zagrum Corporation, as twosenior executives show him the many ways he's "in the box," how thatlimits him as a leader in ways he's not aware of, and of course how toget out. This is as much a book about personal transformation as it isabout leadership per se. The authors use examples from the characters'private as well as professional lives to show how self-deception skewsour view of ourselves and the world and ruins our interactions withpeople, despite what we sincerely believe are our best intentions.
While the writing won't make John Updike lose any sleep, the storyentertainingly does the job of pulling the reader in and making apotentially abstruse argument quite enjoyable. The authors have a muchbetter ear for dialogue than is typical of the genre (the book islargely dialogue), although a certain didactic tone creeps in now andthen. But ultimately it's a hopeful, even inspiring read that flowsalong nicely and conveys a message that more than a few managers needto hear. --Pat McGill
Product Description:
Leadership and Self-Deception is the first book to identify a single, underlying cause of every form of leadership failure. Through the story of Toma shluck in his managers wordsreaders discover that identifying and treating individual leadership problems as if they were separate and distinct is not enough to transform people into successful leaders. The authors suggest that the key to leadership lies not in what we do, but in how we "are." They explore this compelling secret: Self-deception is the central player and trap underlying all leadership failures, relationship issues, and performance problems in organizations. Leaders who live in the box of self-deception are trapped: they cannot lead, no matter how hard they try and no matter how many skills and techniques they employ. With convincing examples, the authors show clearly how self-deception operates and how to overcome it. While other books cover people skills, this one goes deeper, fully illuminating the secret to leadership success.
Alternate Versions:
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Customer Reviews
Average Rating:
Rating: 
- Excellent book
The format of illustrating the points of self deception by telling a story was very effective for me.I found the book easy to read and follow.It was so good, I am going to read it a second time so that the points will stick.
I also read The Anatomy of Peace.It's good to read both in chronological order.
Rating: 
- Avoiding pitfalls of self-deception in leadership
Arbinger Institute's Leadership and Self-Deception is a worthy read for anyone in leadership.It's a little slow to read, too repetitive for my taste, but still worthwhile as it points to how we sabotage ourselves by our behavior toward employees/volunteers.As we attempt to defend a false self-image: like perfection or being nice or doing good we become something false altogether!According to Scott Peck, we could even become evil by our protection of this false image, being 'in the box' according ... Read More
Rating: - Changed my life
I came upon this book at a time of crisis in my life created by my own self deception and it has changed not only my approach to my career but my personal life as well.It is a very easy read and digestable.I recommend it to anyone who is frustrated with progress in their career or better yet before they get frustrated.
Rating: - Not just for business, good for family and overall relationships
This is a very easy-to-read book because it's told as a story of a fictitious company and the training it puts a new manager through.Don't be fooled by the simplicity however; this is a powerful book with an important message -- essentially that we are often too immersed in the problem to see how much we contribute (or in fact are the problem).
It's interesting that the title is so targeted to the business book genre with Leadership prominently in the lead.Lots of the examples in the book ... Read More
Rating: - Life Changing
I have applied the concepts from this book both in my personal and professional lives. It is amazing that such a simple concept can change you so much. My team has noticed the difference. My husband has commented that I have changed. I am seeing changes in my team and my husband in their interactions with me. I recommend it to anyone.
- Excellent bookThe format of illustrating the points of self deception by telling a story was very effective for me.I found the book easy to read and follow.It was so good, I am going to read it a second time so that the points will stick.
I also read The Anatomy of Peace.It's good to read both in chronological order.
- Avoiding pitfalls of self-deception in leadershipArbinger Institute's Leadership and Self-Deception is a worthy read for anyone in leadership.It's a little slow to read, too repetitive for my taste, but still worthwhile as it points to how we sabotage ourselves by our behavior toward employees/volunteers.As we attempt to defend a false self-image: like perfection or being nice or doing good we become something false altogether!According to Scott Peck, we could even become evil by our protection of this false image, being 'in the box' according ... Read More
- Changed my lifeI came upon this book at a time of crisis in my life created by my own self deception and it has changed not only my approach to my career but my personal life as well.It is a very easy read and digestable.I recommend it to anyone who is frustrated with progress in their career or better yet before they get frustrated.
- Not just for business, good for family and overall relationshipsThis is a very easy-to-read book because it's told as a story of a fictitious company and the training it puts a new manager through.Don't be fooled by the simplicity however; this is a powerful book with an important message -- essentially that we are often too immersed in the problem to see how much we contribute (or in fact are the problem).
It's interesting that the title is so targeted to the business book genre with Leadership prominently in the lead.Lots of the examples in the book ... Read More
- Life ChangingI have applied the concepts from this book both in my personal and professional lives. It is amazing that such a simple concept can change you so much. My team has noticed the difference. My husband has commented that I have changed. I am seeing changes in my team and my husband in their interactions with me. I recommend it to anyone.
